How

I often look back at my life and when I look at some of those times, I wonder, how did I get there?
When I think about the first trouble points in my life, I remember saying to myself, “Why am I doing this?”, “I know this is wrong”. As time progressed I found myself saying, “Why is God doing this to me”?
I realize now that I was gradually taking the blame away from myself.
Who happily blames themselves for their own mistakes? Why not blame it all on God? Didn’t he create me this way to begin with?
The problem with “the blame” is that our perception that we are going downhill starts to be taken away until ignorance rears its ugly head. We start to become blinded by our own evil intentions. We start to believe the lie that we are good enough. There is one major problem with this belief: NO ONE IS GOOD ENOUGH! The Christian, not good enough, the business man, not good enough, the Samaritan, not good enough, The Pope, not good enough. It’s just not possible.
What about that person you lied to in order to get what you wanted? What about the man or woman you slept with outside of marriage? How about Murder, Envy, Idolatry? Let me tell you, if you have done one of these things you have done them all.

Now you come to the big question, “How did I get here”? This might be a surprise to some, but it was what you surrounded yourself with. The wrong friends, influences, emotions, thoughts and teachers are what put you there. You were told to think better, to read the self help book, to bury your feelings deep inside and forget them. You were told that you should just try harder. Did that help? Were the people teaching you these things doing well enough in their own lives to tell you how to live yours?

I don’t know why we run away. I don’t why we want to die sometimes. I don’t know why people don’t understand us. I think we know deep inside, though, that there is something that says we are better. There is something that says we mean more. There is something that says we were never made to end up in that spot. There is something that says we were made to have a happy life. We just want to deny that calling inside of us. We don’t want to admit that there is a GOD. THIS IS WHAT IT ALL COMES DOWN TOO.
Most of us know at least a few of the Ten Commandments: Don’t worship other gods, don’t kill, commit adultery, and so on. Somebody, at some point in our lives, has or will tell us something about these rules. After all the disappointment in our lives, these rules are the reason we chose not to believe in God or to not want to change our lives. If we chose to follow, then we have to admit how messed up we have always been. We have to confess how much wrong we have done. WE FEEL CONDEMNED. If we live our lives the way we always have then we won’t ever have to worry about admitting we were wrong. Not true! Everyone who has lived or ever will live has to stand before God for what they have done.

There is hope. There is a way. There is no longer any condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Why didn’t we see the biggest change in the lives of the people around us who accepted Jesus? It was so obvious. Yeah, they still make mistakes. That is only because they are human. The difference is the look on their faces. The difference is the drastic changes in their lives. They no longer feel condemned. They have accepted the grace, mercy, and love of God. How many true Christians do you see wanting to die? If they were true Christians, then not many. True Christians realize that they have already faced the only death they will ever have to because of Jesus. The bible says that those who are born of flesh will die to the flesh, but those who are alive in Christ will have eternal life.

How did I get there? It was by my own ignorance to what the people around me, who loved me, were saying. They told me that God was real. They said he loved me more than anything created. They said I could have a happy life. I just didn’t believe. I couldn’t. I believed what the rest of the world was saying to me. That drugs, sex, alcohol, money and fame were happiness. They were WRONG. None of those things ever kept me happy. I just always wanted more. But the hole was deep and eternal. Something eternally empty can only be filled with something eternally full. The only thing that can possibly be eternally full is love. And God expressed His love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
However you got there, IT DOESN’T MATTER. However long you’ve been there, IT DOESN’T MATTER. You can be free. You can experience the life you were meant to have. Remember that no matter where you are God loves you. He is whispering to your heart and soul, “Believe me when I tell you, I love you SO MUCH. I am standing right beside you. I’ve carried you through the times you thought you couldn’t go any further. I did not create you to hurt. I created you so that I could love you. Believe. Please believe that I am here and that when you call out to me, I hear you. I hear the yearnings from deepest part of your heart. I hear the cries that words could never express. I will give you hope that can only be found in me. I will give you strength that nothing can conquer. Trust in me, with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength, and I will direct your paths. I AM………..all you have ever hoped for.”